


Goodbye Makoto

by Tastethatcake



Category: Free!
Genre: Angst, Grief/Mourning, M/M, Makoto dies in episode five, Mentions of other characters - Freeform, Short, slight AU, this is two years later
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-18
Updated: 2013-11-18
Packaged: 2018-01-01 22:32:45
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,224
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1049340
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tastethatcake/pseuds/Tastethatcake
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Haru celebrates the two year anniversary of Makoto's death in his own way.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Goodbye Makoto

“So, how do you think it happened?”  
“That’s the question, isn’t it. The fact is, we don’t have a clear explanation.”

Two men, one short and one tall, stood in the slightly chilly and extremely sterile morgue of the Iwatobi Hospital. A body lay before them, pale skinned and covered up to the head with a white blanket.

‘What do you mean? He drowned, didn’t he?”  
“That’s how it looks. But he is one of the swimmers on the Iwatobi high school swim team, and the waters he was found in were placid at the time.”  
“What, really?” The short man asked. The Iwatobi High swim team members were local legends, athletic geniuses spawned in a small town. “So... an expert swimmer drowned for no reason? Perhaps it was hypothermia. The water is cold around this time of year.”  
“Impossible. The state of his internal organs have showed that he could not have been in the water long enough for that to even happen.”  
“So, what? Did he just go in the water and stay there?” His tone was joking, but the doctor sighed and said quietly, “it seems to be so.”

***

Haruka Nanase regretted a lot of things. 

Throwing his life away was certainly one. Losing all his friends was another. Realizing that he wasn’t as special as some people seemed to think? Well, that was inevitable. But still, it hurt.

It has been twenty three months, twenty nine days, and exactly thirty minutes since his best friend and partner had died. Twenty three months, twenty nine days and exactly thirty minutes since he last went swimming. Twenty three months, twenty nine days and exactly thirty minutes since he had truly died himself.

Haru sat on the beach, the night sky stretched above him and the hard packed sand was cool under his legs. Makoto would have commented on how nice of a night it was, if he was here. Too bad he wasn’t.

Haru hadn’t talked to any of his old friends in so long, he wondered if they still thought about him. In the beginning, his lack of communication towards them could be explained by grieving. They understood that he needed time alone, and they all respected that, even Nagisa. As time stretched on, though, he began to receive worried texts asking where he was and how he was feeling and whether he would go to today’s swim, all of which he never replied to. Sometimes Nagisa would run up to him in the hall and babble about inane things like school work or swimming before Rei would catch up and pull him away, whispering about privacy and leaving Haru-chan-san alone.

He missed them, sometimes. He had since learned through the grapevine that the Iwatobi swim team had disbanded at the loss of their captain and the quitting of their star swimmer. 

All of that had felt insignificant at the time, though. A tsunami of emotion was constantly attacking him, pulling away his grip on reality. It wasn’t easy, living. His grades dropped (not that they were great in the first place) and he barely attended school. His only passion and real skill was gone, and he had no hope for any future. The future had always been insignificant when Makoto was around. All that mattered when Haru looked into Makoto’s eyes was the present, all that mattered was the swim team and the feeling of water enveloping him and what it was like when Makoto’s  
lips touched his-

But that was all gone now and he was faced with a brand new reality that someday he would need an income and skills and he didn’t have a person to carry him through. 

Haru looked down at his watch. Three minutes until the two year anniversary of Makoto’s death. 

Their first kiss had been on this very beach. It was the evening, and they had been out on a walk. As the sun set, Makoto finally reached down and pulled Haru’s face towards his own. Their teeth had clacked together and Makoto giggled. They had gotten it right the second time, though, and they had kissed countless times since. Haru didn’t know much about romance, but he knew he loved Makoto.

He suspected the rest of the swim team knew about their relationship too. Whenever their relationship was brought up, Haru’s response was only ever a blank stare, but Makoto always had blushed and rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly. 

The final thing Haru regretted was never telling Makoto he loved him. This had never seemed important at the time, and Haru didn’t really know how to bring something like that up anyway. Besides, they both knew they loved each other. That was an unstated fact that lived between both of them every time they touched. Still though, it seemed relevant now. Like maybe if Makoto had heard him say it, it would have changed his fate somehow. It didn’t make any sense, but love never did, did it?

Haru’s watch beeped, bringing him out of his wistful reverie. The sound indicated that is was a minute before 12:00 AM. He stood up and undressed, quickly revealing the swimsuit that he hadn’t even looked at in two years. He had felt extremely resentful towards the sport he once loved after Makoto’s death, blatantly blaming water and the whole swimming team for killing him. Water. The force of nature that he once lived for took his lover away.

These thoughts were lost, however, as he stepped into the cold expanse before them. He greeted the water like an old friend as he waded into the ocean. He counted the seconds off as he held his breath and submerged his head, each moment bringing him closer to 12:00. This was a true rebirth, his lips lifted into a smile as he opened his eyes. The water cradled him and soothed him like he was a baby.

Three.

This was the reunion he had been waiting for. Makoto would have wanted this. In fact, Makoto would have wanted Haru to live his life normally without him. This was the closest Haru would ever get to living normally without Makoto and he knew it.

Two.

Haru knew he was crying there, underneath the water, but his tears were washed away, ready to be mixed with the sea forever. He hoped he would become part of the ocean one day.

One. 

Makoto believed in heaven, and now as Haru floated there, he kind of did too. He believed that somewhere beyond the grave he would see Mako again, and they would become one. He hoped that Mako would greet him with that warm smile and a forgiving heart. He hoped that after he breathed his last breath, his friends would cry for him as he cried for Makoto. He wondered what death would feel like.

Zero.

It was time. Haru, without hesitation, sucked in the water like it was air. He felt it wash into his lungs and become part of him. He choked and coughed under the waves and he took in another mouthful of water. Lights dimmed before his eyes and he stopped thinking. A smile still rested upon his lips as Haruka Nanase drowned and floated it to the surface of the ocean.

Haruka Nanase would never regret ever again.

**Author's Note:**

> Remember to comment, give kudos, or bookmark if you like! Thanks for reading :)


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